Publications

Published in The  Immigrant Report

Published in The Immigrant Report

Excerpt From Article:

“To my surprise, the land still didn't feel like home without him here. I had romanticized belonging to the earth that gave birth to me: Mexico Lindo! without my father’s shadow being cast across all of my beautiful tierra. “Don’t I deserve to exist in Mexico without family trauma embracing me too?” I would often think. I imagined the pillage: voyaging through the desert the same way mami did to leave Mexico. I longed to return because I couldn't without self-deporting. I was undocumented for twenty years of my life. I have never been a citizen of the United States, and I have never lived in Mexico as a rightful citizen, because my home is not there.

My gender dysphoria and body dysmorphia create a border between me, my internal spirit, and the body I was born in. But ironically, this body, this conflict of gender, sexuality, spirit, and body, has also been displaced at large with where I “belong” or can legally exist in the world. Through the polemic shrouding our freedom: borders, legal citizenship, body, gender and sexuality, I float in liminality, in a mystical realm of galaxies, shooting stars, spirits, ancestors, and ephemerality. I held the existential mirror Kimchi granted for me in this mystical moment and wept for all the ways I’ve been told or have felt I do not belong.”

Excerpt From Article:

“I sit around and listen to these immigrant moms and think of my own; she who left a whole world behind for fear of dying with me in her womb. My father bewitched two women. One was his angry wife with three children and another baby on the way, the other was my mother. When my father’s wife realized I was sprouting inside my mom’s womb she showed up with a shotgun at my mom’s job and wanted us dead. My half siblings stoned my mom’s car and grandmother’s house. They knew everything about us: where we lived, how we lived, where everyone worked. So my mom, the “other woman,” packed our bags, pulled me from my grandmother’s nurturing arms and fled to the United States.”

Excerpt From Article: